Counseling for Marriage and Couples

The vocation to marriage is a call to steer a tiny boat across a sometimes stormy sea. - Pope Saint Paul VI

Our relationships are the most important parts of our lives. When your marriage or romantic relationship is struggling it can feel as though the very foundation of your life is at risk. If you are struggling your marriage or relationship and are looking to rebuild trust, overcome conflict together, or grow closer to one another couples counseling may be for you!

When Should Couples go to Therapy?

It can be difficult to know when is the right time to seek outside assistance in your relationship. How long is too long to keep trying to work it out yourselves? Is it a crutch to ask someone else to be a third party in the decision making process? Here are some potential signs that seeing a couples therapist could be a prudent first step!

Problem solving is stuck, your keep having the same argument over and over again.
No matter the size of the disagreement your are arguing frequently
You feel emotionally distant and can't quite seem to close the gap
There has been a rupture in trust that feels daunting to heal alone
You are disagreeing on how to parent and need a solution sooner rather than later.
Your relationship is struggling to transition from one life stage to another:
- dating to engaged, just married to having children, now we're empty nesters
You want to start of marriage well and have an objective party help you navigate and prepare for your wedding

Our Approach to Couples Cousneling

Objectivity: One of the first things to know is that your therapist will not take sides! In marriage counseling the therapist doesn't have two clients, she has one, the relationship! If you are fearful that going to couples counseling might mean the therapist gangs up on you, be at ease! A key feature of quality marriage and couples counseling is that the therapist is on the side of the relationship, not either one of the individuals!

Evidence Based Treatment: With something as valuable as your relationship our therapists are not just making it up as they go along. At Grace and Nature we believe that evidence based models are our most powerful tool and starting point in helping couples and individuals grow and heal. This means that we are not reinventing the wheel! Your sessions will be grounded in theories and models that have been tried, tested, and researched!

Faith Integration: For many couples faith is the center point and bedrock of their relationship. At Grace and Nature we integrate faith into our treatment at the level that makes sense for each individual and the couple. We can bring a Christian Catholic understanding of marriage into the counseling space. We understand marriage as a vocation, a place where the Lord has called you to grow not only in relationship but also in personal virtue and holiness. Our counselors are all practicing members of the Catholic Church and are faithful to the teachings of the magisterium.

What You can Expect in Couples Counseling:

Your therapist will work to understand your uniquely individual relationship
You will identify specific goals your have for your relationship so everyone is on the same page and moving in the same direction!
Common areas of work:
- Communication
- Conflict resolution
- Emotional distance
- Intimacy concerns
- Rebuilding of trust
- Understanding relational patterns
- Faith differences
- Parenting challenges
- Life transitions and trauma
- Premarital Counseling
Once your therapist has determined agreed upon goals there will be a clear plan towards reaching those goals!

Frequently Asked Questions:

Do both partners need to attend?
- Yes! If what you are wanting to work on is couples counseling it inherently requires both parties to be present.
What if my partner is hesitant to attend?
- A common barrier for couples counseling is that one person is hesitant to attend. If your partner is hesitant ask them if they would be willing to speak to the therapist on an individual phone consult to explain their concerns about counseling or their reasons for hesitancy. A one on one phone call can help them feel that their individual concerns have been seen and validated and that this is a choice they are making.
What if my partner refuses to attend?
- Although you will not be able to proceed with couples counseling, individual counseling may be a good option for you! If you are in a space where your partner is not willing to take your concern seriously enough to attend a session, then you can work through and be supported in this challenge with a therapist.
Do you offer virtual sessions?
- Yes! Virtual is a great option to accommodate the variable schedules of the couple and therapist!
Can counseling help if we are considering separation or divorce?
- Yes! couples counseling can help with any stage or concern in a relationship. It is important to know that the therapist is never going to attempt to manipulate either party into an action or lack of action that they do not feel comfortable with. If this is your concern please hit the "contact us" button to schedule a consultation. By the time a relationship has reached this stage the circumstances surrounding such a decision or inherently complex and sensitive in nature. As therapists we are trained to listen well and understand the nuance of every individual circumstance. We would love to speak to you to help you untangle what your next best step would be!
How long does couples counseling take?
- This probably not the answer you're hoping for, but it's definitely the green flag answer: It's different for everyone. Each relationship is infinitely unique and so are the challenges and goals of each couple. Schedule a phone call with us today and we can help you understand what the counseling path may look like for your unique circumstance!
Do you offer premarital counseling?
- Absolutely! Reach out today to talk to a therapist about what exactly you want to accomplish before getting engaged or tying the knot!

Relationships and marriage are inherently complex and complicated and with that can come the need for outside assistance. Deciding to see a therapist for your relationship isn't a sign of failure, it's a decision to invest in one of the most important relationships in your life. And you don't have to do that alone!

If you feel overwhelmed or unsure where to begin, the simplest next step is to reach out. Schedule a consult today, and we will walk with you as you decide your best next steps!